Ouran Encounter
by Allabm
Summary: New students come to Ouran academy...things get out of hand. Crack! Rated T  TxH/KxOC/HixOC/KyxOC/MxOC/HoxOC/RxOC...BTW did I mention alot of crazy things happen? The Host club will be scarred forever...
1. Chapter 1

Hi! This is my Ouran High School Host Club fanfic! I've been working on this for awhile. The OC's are based on me and my friends.  
Rika- Me  
Kagami & Maiko- BFFLS Actually twins  
Amaya- BFF  
Hitoshi- Childhood friend, BFF  
Avaron- BFF

* * *

Chapter One

Fuck. Just perfect. Kagami keeps trying to make this story HER point of view, and to kill Hitoshi. But the second part isn't that important! My name is Rika Ishikawa. I'm here in the elite Ouran Academy along with my friends, Amaya Iwate, Kagami and Maiko Hokkaido, and Hitoshi Niigata. The five of us had been great childhood friends in the orphanage we used to live in until our "parents" Akihiro and Masuyo adopted us. (A/N: Psh, trying to be the next Madonna's!)

The two are very rich and here we are now. It is after school hours and this goofy yellow dress is annoying me. Amaya clutched her white bun-bun she had since she was a baby, and Kagami keeps on chasing Hitoshi down the hallways of the large castle called a schoolhouse. Maiko kept spinning around since she loved wearing long skirts and to dance.

"GET BACK HERE HITOSHI!" screamed Kagami.

"Jesus… does the girl know that it's not right to kill people inside school?" Amaya asked. I shrugged my shoulders and kept on walking with Amaya as Maiko followed behind us still spinning. Hitoshi ran into a supply closet, and Kagami who didn't notice, as usual, ran into an abandoned music room.

"KAGAMI WAIT!" Amaya and I shouted as we rushed into the room with Maiko, who stopped spinning, following. We entered the room and in front of us, were… guys…hot guys…and a lot of tall hot guys…

"Amaya" I whispered tugging on her arm.

"Yes Rika?" she asked.

"I see a bunch of rapists" I replied. Their faces turned white as they heard me and then a very tall blond one came up to us.

"Why hello ladies, and I believe it is by fate that we meet" he spoke. Amaya raised her eyebrows at the weird guy. Kagami who was at our side tackled him screaming, and then ran off towards a rapist with black hair and glasses. He stood up and his facial expression was in an upset tone.

"Rika" Amaya stated.

"Yes?" I replied.

"These aren't potential rapists. They are a host club"

"FUCK!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "IT'D BE BETTER IF THEY WERE RAPISTS! WE'D HAVE RAPE KITS, BUT COME ON! A HOST CLUB! YOU REALLY THINK GIRLS ARE INTO THIS CRAP?"

"According to all of our customers, yes, girls are into this" said the guy Kagami kept bugging. There were two twin boys, one with orange hair, the other with a dark ash color. One (orange hair) started _crying_.

"Kaoru! What's wrong?" asked the other twin.

"The girl over there. She hurt my feelings Hikaru" "Kaoru" told him.

"Don't worry Kaoru. I'll protect you. Forever" Hikaru told him hugging him. Then a bunch of girls screamed in amusement.

"RAPIST HOSTS AND HOMOS! THIS DAY KEEPS GETTING WORSE!" I screamed.

"Rika! Calm down! Besides let's dance! I'm bored anyways, and I have my iPod!" Maiko sung as she plugged in her iPod into a speaker. "Never mind" she said as she took mine and started to play songs from DDR. She grabbed my arm and started making me dance. I would've given in completely, one if we weren't surrounded by rapists and if I wasn't pissed off.

Maiko kept spinning me around and (due to my clumsiness) I tripped and fell on my ass. Maiko still kept dancing. Amaya slowly started to give into the dancing and then Kagami joined us. Soon the all started to do a kick line! The door slowly opened.

"Guys… I'm lonely outside… where are you?" Hitoshi asked.

"In here…" I said.

"Why is there a host club here… I thought you guys hated that crap?" he asked.

"We do. Kagami thought you were in here" I explained as I stood up.

"Then…why are they… dancing?"

"Maiko"

"Ah" Hitoshi replied.

"Who are you?" asked the tall blond idiot.

"OUR CUDDLY WUDDLY TEDDY BEAR! WHO IM GOING TO KILL!" shouted Kagami as she attacked Hitoshi.

"GET OFF OF ME!" he shrieked as she started punching him. The two twins started laughing.

A girl with very short brown hair was serving instant coffee. And she was dressed as a guy!

"Um excuse me… can we talk privately please?" I asked her.

"Uh… sure…" she replied.

"NO! HARUHI! DON'T LEAVE DADDY'S SIDE!" the blond idiot yelled. I grabbed her hand and pulled her out for a moment.

"Why is it that you are pretending to be a male student and in the host club?" I asked her.

"What are you talking about?" she asked nervously.

"Oh come on! Only idiots would believe that you're a guy!"

"But…I am…" she continued.

"No you aren't. You're a female. Anyone can see. Unless you're a person that goes to this school" I said.

The girl snickered. "You know, I think I'm going to like you guys. And yes…I am a girl. I only work for the Host Club because I owe them money after I broke a really, really expensive vase"

"What morons… anyway let's go back in there before the blond idiot goes insane". We walked inside and saw the tall blond one in a corner crying. Amaya was talking to the really short one who had a toy bunny also, but pink. Kagami kept punching Hitoshi, Maiko was sitting down since she decided not to dance anymore, and Hitoshi was screaming. A girl with caramel hair was sitting in the room and kept staring at Hitoshi. Was she interested in him? Was this a bad first impression? Probably, no girl likes a guy that can get beaten up by a girl wearing a dress.

The blond idiot got out of the corner and started hugging the female "transvestite" and asking her things if I hurt her in anyway. I sighed and sat down next to Maiko.

"Yes?" she asked.

"Why?" I questioned.

"Why what?"

"Why did we have to be adopted. I mean it's nice, but I think we can handle ourselves more at the orphanage than getting used to all of this luxury" I told Maiko.

"I know, but come on, maybe this time it will be keepers" Maiko responded as she put her hand on my shoulder. Maiko and Kagami had been returned to the orphanage since people couldn't get used to their bouncy and happy attitudes and pranks. Hitoshi was hated by people because he believed in something called hope. Amaya wasn't liked since she was gothic. And I was a combination of all four. All of us were combinations, since every bit of us had rubbed off on each other.

"THAT WAS SO SWEET!" yelled the blond idiot with fake tears as he hugged us.

"GET OFF!" Maiko and I both yelled. Maiko pushed him off and he fell onto the floor.

"Looks like milord got hurt by girls again. A twin girl. How is you're relationship with your sister?" one of the twin boys asked Maiko.

"Pretty average. She's just my sister and friend every now and then."

"WHAT!" they were mortified.

"Yeah. We're just sisters," Kagami said as she jumped onto Maiko's back, "She's older so I get piggy back rides!"

"No you don't!" Maiko shouted as she threw Kagami off of her.

"Where are our manners?" asked the glasses guy.

"My name is Tamaki Suoh!" said the tall blond. "That is Mitsukini (Honey) Honinozuka, and Takashi (Mori) Morinozuka. They are third years! Over there is Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin, they're first years, and there is Kyoya Ootori, second year like moi, and my little daughter Haruhi Fujioka, first year. Now that we've introduced ourselves, you must introduce yourselves"

Amaya stepped forward being the oldest out of our group right now, "My name is Amaya Iwate, second year, the boy is Hitoshi Niigata, second year, Kagami and Maiko Hokkaido, first years, and Rika Ishikawa, first year"

"Okay…so there are five teenagers, one is a guy, and the rest are girls, and he's straight. You haven't jumped on any of them yet?" Hikaru asked.

Kagami slapped Hitoshi on accident due to her muscle spasms.

"GET YOUR MUSCLES BACK INTO ORDER!" he yelled.

"Not my fault!" Kagami sang.

"Uh…yes it is" I replied. Hitoshi growled.

"Back in your cage tiger!" Maiko yelled.

"I'm leaving" Amaya stated as she left the room and we all followed her. If Amaya was mad or pissed then so were we. If she was happy or excited, so were we. She's not the leader, she just has the most affect with emotions on you.

"The first day wasn't so bad was it?" I asked.

"Yeah. Like Kagami trying to kill me is fun" Hitoshi stated sarcastically.

"WHY YES IT IS!" Kagami replied.

* * *

So it's about a week after our encounter with the Host Club. And today the teacher said that we're getting a project with partners. Isn't that great? I sat down at my desk tapping my fingers on it waiting for the assignment to be handed out.

"Hello class. I have a special assignment that I'd like to tell you all about. You're all going to be paired up and you have to take care of a fake baby. The baby will have to be taken care of and I will be able to know what you do to it. I have assigned you all partners and when you are called sit next to your partner. Now since we have an even amount of boys and girls, there will be mothers and fathers. And if you're gay…too bad!"

The teacher had started to call out names for partners.

"Kagami Hokkaido and Ritsu Kasanoda are proud parents of a not really healthy weird looking baby boy!". Kagami sat next to a guy with weird red hair and got handed their baby. "Maiko Hokkaido and Hikaru Hitachiin are parents of a baby boy," "Rika Ishikawa and Kaoru Hitachiin are parents of a baby girl," "Renge Houshakuji and Haruhi Fujioka are parents of a baby girl" The teacher spoke and then said more names. I sat next to the twin with orange hair and ignored him while he held the baby.

"What a stupid piece of plastic" I heard Hikaru say while Maiko was cooing and tickling the fake baby.

"This assignment is stupid" I mumbled.

"The baby is so cute…I think…" Kaoru said.

"I LOVE MY BABY!" Kagami shouted as she spun around holding her baby and thanks to her muscle spasms, it fell out of the window. You start to hear crying noises coming from a hunk of plastic!

"The assignment didn't officially start yet and you killed your child?" the teacher questioned.

"Can we get a new baby?" Kasanoda asked.

"Would you leave you're real child there?"

"I was going to say yes…but if you put it that way…" Kagami stated.

"Go get the baby!" the teacher yelled.

* * *

Kagami and Kasanoda ran outside an hour later since they had forgotten about their child. Its head had fallen off.

"What the hell?" asked Kagami. Kasanoda shrugged. Kaoru Hitachiin walked by them whistling holding a screwdriver and an outfit for the baby girl he has to wear that his mother designed.

"It has screwdriver markings on it"

"I have an idea!" Kagami shouted as she took a hammer and nails out of her pocket.

"Oh no" Kasanoda spoke as he looked at the psychotic girl who started nailing the baby's head back onto the body.

"He'll look as beautiful as ever!" Kagami sang

"WAIT DON'T DO THAT!" Kasanoda yelled.

"Well if we had a real child and his head fell off where would we go?"

"…The…hospital…?"

"TO THE HOSPITAL WE GO!" Kagami shouted as she tugged on Kasanoda's arm.

* * *

I sat at a table during lunch waiting for Kaoru to come back with whatever he was going to get for the baby.

"Honey! I'm home!" Kaoru said as he sat down.

"Call me honey one more time and you'll lose the thing that makes you pee"`

"Okay, darling" Kaoru snickered. I glared at him.

"So what did you get for the baby thing?" I asked him.

"Our child is not a thing!" he replied.

"Fine. What did you get for the plastic?"

"THAT'S EVEN WORSE!"

"What did you bring for the baby?" I asked the guy one more time.

"A dress!" Kaoru responded holding up a pink dress with puffy sleeves, and a puffy bottom, yellow ribbons on the bottom, and a thin headband that was light pink and had a yellow ribbon on it.

"Our kid is NOT wearing that!"

"YES SHE IS!"

"NO WAY IN HELL IS THE BABY WEARING THAT!"

"Why not!" Kaoru whined.

"Because, it's pink, frilly, itchy, and too girly!"

"NU UH!"

"NOT PROPER LANGUAGE!"

"SHUT UP!"

"WHY DON'T YOU!"

Many people started to stare at us.

"LET ME PUT IT ON THE BABY!"

"AW HELL NO!" I shouted. Then the idiot host club came up to us. God…are you there? If you are, can you give me a gun right now? Or a bomb? At least a machete!

"What's going on- OH MY GOD A BABY!" Tamaki yelled and ran up to it and started tickling it, not realizing that it was fake. The baby recording then giggled. Stupid idiot.

I looked over to see Maiko taking extra care of her baby, with Hikaru nowhere to be found. Her baby boy was wearing a blue shirt with green pants. She walked over to us and sat down.

"Do you think the school sells warm milk for babies?" she wondered aloud. My god she's stupid…

"You know you can't really feed this thing right?" I asked her.

She looked at me with wide eyes and sarcastically said "But then it will starve!"

"But the mouth doesn't open!" Haruhi laughed.

"OK! I get it now! She wants us to take care of the baby with love and stuff, we don't have to feed it, and we have to protect it at all costs. I missed the feeding it part though cause the baby was so kawaii!" I rolled my eyes at her.

"NO really? And how can you take care of the baby if you're always so depressed Maiko?"

"IM NOT DEPRESSD!" She whined/ screamed.

"Yes you are." I said broadly. "And where did you get the protecting thing from?"

"Well the teacher said we have to treat them like they were really our own. If I had kids I would be the type of mother that would protect them with my life. Besides my grade in this class is sort of on the line too." I knew she was lying. She felt like she needed to protect any living thing that had ever come in contact with her.

"Tamaki give me the baby NOW!"

"NO WAY IT'S SOOOOO CUTE!"

"Give me the damn baby"

"NOOO"

"Tamaki. Can you please give me my baby?" asked Kaoru with puppy dog eyes.

"O-o-kay" he stuttered handing Kaoru the baby.

"TAMAKI'S GAY!" Hitoshi shouted. Tamaki's face turned completely red.

"So the perverted man is gay…?" Honey asked.

"Yeah" Mori said. Kaoru started putting the baby in the dress.

"NO!" I shouted and tackled Kaoru.

"Someone's a bit frisky" Maiko spoke.

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" I screeched. I heard her cackle and she spun away with her baby to the other side of the table next to Hitoshi. She rested her head on his shoulder. The weird part was her twin hated him, and she loved. Like a big brother that was actually cool. We saw Kagami and Kasanoda walking in the lunch room.

"OUR BABY HAS BEEN FIXEDED BY THE NURSE!" Kagami yelled.

"Oh god" I mumbled as I looked at the baby that they held, it's whole head and neck had been wrapped in duct tape, there was a nail sticking out of it's head, and was covered in dirt.

"What the hell?" Hitoshi blurted out.

"AIN'T IT BEAUTIFUL!" Kagami shrieked. Kaoru's eyes were wide with shock, Tamaki died, Honey stood behind Mori, Haruhi blinked a few times, Maiko tried to ignore her sister, Amaya had just walked in and slowly started to back out of the room, and I was used to this crap.

"No. It's ugly. I can't believe YOU killed our kid" Kasanoda spoke.

"IT'S BEAUTIFUL!" Kagami yelled at him. Her muscle spasms went crazy again and the baby went flying into the kitchen cooking pot for a type of soup.

Kasanoda and Kagami screamed and ran after the baby.

"Be lucky that I'm a good father and would never ever leave you or our child" Kaoru said whispering into my ear.

"GET AWAY!" I yelled as I slapped him.

"Ow…you're mean" Kaoru replied.

"Don't care! I really don't care anymore. I'm leaving!" I yelled walking out of the cafeteria. The guy didn't win the whole battle yet. He just had a point. But next time, and every other time, Rika Ishikawa is going to win, no matter how much Kaoru Hitachiin doesn't like it.


	2. Chapter 2

Here's chapter two! My internet is somewhat down and it's up right now so I'm using it to update my stories. ^^

* * *

Chapter Two

Rika Ishikawa will win this battle. Kaoru Hitachiin will lose. And to make sure that I win, we've decided that the two of us will work on the project over the weekend. I stood in front of the Hitachiin mansion. I wore a grey tank top, a leather jacket that ended short and curved, black skinny jeans, and black leather sneakers with neon green laces.

I ran a few fingers through my hair and then the gates had opened. Finally! I've waited about twenty minutes for the gates to open. I started walking into the mansion.

"Master Kaoru is ready to see you" a servant spoke as he answered the door.

"…Thanks…"

"Rika! Oh how I've missed you!" Kaoru shouted as he reached the bottom of the grand staircase with arms extended.

"Oh god! Get away!" I replied pushing him back.

"You don't like my love?" he asked with a frown.

"Nope. Not at all!"

"WHAT!" Kaoru shouted. Holy crap…what happened to him…what did Tamaki do…?

"I mean that I don't want affection. I just want to get the project over with, you know?"

"Uh…sure…whatever floats your boat."

"Well where's the baby?"

"Oh she's upstairs, come with me." He said walking up the grand staircase. I followed. We then reached a door and he opened it. I thought it would be his room. It was a nursery.

The nursery was a light purple with yellow flowers painted on the walls. The floor was a creamy white with a green rug. There was a bunch of toys and a crib with the baby in it. Our child wore a blue frilly dress.

"This time it's not pink" Kaoru simply said.

"Are you kidding me? You made a nursery just for a baby we have for two weeks?" I asked him.

"I told Hikaru he can use it too, when he's not being an ass to Maiko."

"I agree with the ass part, but isn't this a bit overboard?"

"Not at all Rika. You see I got a checklist from the teacher. And I completed part of a task!" Kaoru responded. I grabbed the checklist that he held. I read it.

1. Treat the baby with care like a real child

2. Take it somewhere

3. Feed/Burp/Diaper Changes

4. Dress it up

5. Have a spot for it somewhere

6. Have family time!

7. Both students must care for child

"When the teacher said to make a spot, I think she meant to have a spot in your room! Not a room for itself! Some newborn babies sleep in their parents room! Idiot" I said giving him a thump on the head.

"But we don't sleep together, unless you want to." Kaoru replied wiggling his eyebrows.

"In your dreams" I told him.

"It'll be fun! You and me snuggled together, me keeping you warm, drinking tea, the baby asleep, fireplace on, maybe one thing leading to another"

"Nope" I responded.

"You never know until you try!"

"I'm not losing to you pervert, got it?"

"You think I'd let you win? Someone's a bit cocky Rika, now let's be good parents and have some fun with the baby." Kaoru told me. I sighed and shrugged going along. Kaoru took the baby out of its crib and got a stroller in the corner.

"For real?" I asked him.

"She said to take it places. People won't think we're too weird, I mean the baby looks pretty realistic" responded Kaoru. I nodded and helped him put the baby in. This is weird. Not the baby thing, Kaoru's attitude. Yesterday he and I were fighting like the end of the world and now he's being calm and sweet, except for that sexual remark…

"Is something wrong Rika?" Kaoru questioned me with concern. I didn't realize I was staring at him.

"Your attitude's different" I stated. He was surprised.

"What do you mean?"

"Yesterday you were completely different, basically a douche bag, and now you're kind, sweet and considerate". He was silent for a minute.

"I'm usually like this… you see, Hikaru and I have trouble making friends, and there was reason I acted like that… I was hoping that you'd be my friend?" I would've started crying if I was sappy and like chick flicks… but it was really sweet what this guy just said. I nodded to his question. Kaoru grinned and gave me a one arm hug and grabbed the stroller with his other hand.

"Should we get the project over with?" I asked.

"Yes. Yes we should."

* * *

Kaoru and I were walking down a street with the baby in the stroller and I kept the hood of the stroller down. Some people didn't care, some were giving us dirty looks, and few smart people noticed it was a fake baby and probably thought we were crazy. Great… good thing I don't give a shit! As we were walking down the street I noticed that Kaoru was glaring at a man.

"Kaoru what are you doing?" I asked him. He didn't reply to me but he wrapped his arm around my waist. I started freaking out, man I wish I was Kagami right now, nobody would arrest her for beating up Kaoru. She's a freak that people can spot out quickly. We walked a bit more and he released me. I was really confused.

"There" he mumbled.

"What the hell was that?" I asked.

"There was a guy checking you out"

"You know I'm a big girl I can handle boys myself" I said.

"He was in his late forties…" Kaoru said quietly. I felt so stupid and ashamed. More stupid than ashamed, very stupid, Tamaki stupid.

"I am so sorry" I told him.

"No it's alright. It's my fault for not telling you at first. You have a right to freak out. Anyway let's forget about this and find a nice place to go to lunch." I nodded.

* * *

We ended up going to a nice little café that I ended up forcing Kaoru to go in. He was planning on going into a fancy restaurant. Not on my watch! Kaoru was a bit grumpy but he kept the baby stroller next to his seat and I was searching through the menu. Yay decent prices!

I saw a girl with short dark brown hair and light brown eyes, who was slightly shorter than me. She was a waitress in the restaurant and I heard her laughing with some of the other workers.

"So Rika, do you know what you want to get?" Kaoru asked me bringing me back to reality.

"I think so…" I replied, and then the waitress I had been watching came over to our table.

"Hi guys, I'm Avaron and I'll be your server today. Would you like anything to drink?" she asked. Avaron… her name is Avaron? It can't be…can it?

"Excuse me, Avaron, what is your last name?" I asked politely.

"Oita, why do you ask?" Oh my God! It is her!

"Ava-chan! Ava-chan! It's Ava-chan Kaoru!" I yelled bouncing up and down in my seat.

"…Rika…?" came out of Kaoru's mouth.

"Rika? It's Rika!" Ava-chan said and hugged me. I hugged back. Kaoru was very confused.

"Rika who's this?" Kaoru asked me.

"This is Avaron. She's another friend of ours from the orphanage but she got out of there before us" I told him. Avaron nodded.

"So Rika…who's the lucky guy?" Avaron asked me. I didn't know what she meant, and then I noticed Kaoru…and the baby. Kaoru realized what was going on.

"Avaron, Kaoru and I, we're just friends, and the baby is for a school project. It's not real, it's a fake"

"Oh thank god!" she said and then the manager looked at her, "Right, what will your order be?"

"I think I'll have the Gyudon, and what about you Kaoru?"

"I'm not really sure, what do you think is good Avaron?"

"Hm, I'll just order for you, you will drink water, Rika can have anything she wants to drink" Avaron told us.

"I'll just have water please" I replied with a smile. Avaron nodded finished writing things down and left.

"She seems nice" Kaoru said.

"Yeah, she is, we need to catch up with her"

* * *

Avaron came back with our food and drink; she gave me my Gyudon and a glass of water and gave Kaoru a very large glass and a bowl full of Wasabi.

"Eat up" she told us.

"Avaron, there must be a mistake; I didn't order a bowl of Wasabi" Kaoru started.

"You're right. I did, you left me in charge of your meal and this is your meal"

"But Wasabi is a side!"

"Too bad Mr. Hitachiin"

"How do you know my last name?"

"I've got my sources" and with that she walked away.

"What's wrong with her?" Kaoru asked me.

"She's bright. Anyway if you're not eating it I'll feed it to you" I responded.

"You're kidding me" he said.

"Nope" I told him and grabbed a spoon and shoved it in his mouth. His face was slightly red. He swallowed it and I shoved more in his mouth. I kept feeding it to him until he got the hang of it and I started eating my gyudon and checked if he was eating and when he wasn't I fed him again.

* * *

Avaron stood in front of the door watching Rika Ishikawa her old friend feeding her _friend_ Kaoru Hitachiin, the son of a famous fashion designer, a bowl of wasabi. Ah young love she thought.

* * *

Kaoru finished the bowl of wasabi thanks to moi! Man he hates me right now. Hmm… is too much wasabi dangerous? Probably is… I made him eat the whole bowl and that bowl was pretty big. Eh he'll be fine…I think…oh shit…if he dies Hikaru is going to get prissy, and then have a temper tantrum, then threaten to kill me, and then put me on his watch list, then actually try to kill me, and then not date Maiko. Crap! And then Maiko's going to be upset because I ruined her chance of getting a boyfriend.

"Hey…Kaoru…you okay?" I asked after a moment of silence. Before he could answer Kaoru cupped his mouth and ran to the nearest trash can to hurl. Oh shit… man I feel so bad. I went to him and started rubbing his back in small circles.

"Sorry…"

"It's okay…you know I would have eaten the wasabi by myself, but I liked you feeding it to me" he said. I smacked him upside the head.

"Baka…" I had a small smile on my face though.

Somebody who looked exactly like Kaoru, except for the clothing, and shade of hair, was walking down the street. Of course it was Hikaru, the one who was being a bastard to Maiko. Kaoru had finished throwing up and came up to me. Hikaru saw us and ran up to Kaoru.

"Hey where were you? I was looking for you" Hikaru stated, ignoring me.

"I was out with Rika" Kaoru replied pulling me closer to him. I was confused… I didn't see any creepy forty year old men.

"Oh, well, come on we'll be late for the movie" Hikaru told him. Kaoru nodded, took the stroller, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. Hikaru and Kaoru started walking away. My hand was on my cheek. He…kissed…me…

Kaoru Hitachiin had kissed me…What the hell?

* * *

"Why'd you kiss her?" Hikaru asked his brother as they started walking to their house to drop off the baby and then to see the movie.

"I'm not really sure Hikaru" his brother told him while pushing the stroller.

"There always has to be a reason Kaoru"

"Hikaru, I like her…a lot. I think I love her…"

Hikaru looked up from his phone and at his brother, "Sorry I was checking movie times again, did you say something?"


	3. Chapter 3

Written by the real Kagami herself...she stole my computer for some time and whenever I tried to read she'd smack me away...

* * *

Chapter Three

Kagami begged and pleaded for a chapter in her perspective… so I wanted her to shut up. Here's her point of view.

Delayed game

I ran around looking for Hitoshi. I wanted to play a game called I chase him and try to bite him. It's a lot of fun! … Okay… maybe it wasn't a game but it was a lot of fun! I walked around now… uh oh… I don't know where I am… maybe Hitoshi does!

I started looking for him more seriously. I'm not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. In fact, I was the smartest in grade averages besides Hitoshi. I just acted crazy because… that was my personality. Why should I stop for a social life in school that practically ended after graduation? I mean…not really… I was nice to the kids who get picked on, were smart, and had to actually get up and get what they wanted. This school was no exception I saw as I rounded the corner.

"Come here kitty, I just want to see your homework," some ugly brute said to a weaker girl in a uniform that didn't quite fit. I realized it was the smallest.

"Why can't you guys leave me alone and do your own homework? I don't have extra time to be doing yours too. Please leave me alone…"

"Shut up and let me see it! I don't have all day!"

"Hey! Big and ugly! Don't be a big meanie!" I screeched as I punched his spine. I knew it was a cheap shot, but that's the only way I know how to fight. That's how we were raised back in the orphanage. It was the only way we could survive… plus pressure points from a book from the library and I was unstoppable.

"What did you call me?" oops… I missed the target… ah well.

"Oops! Was that not politically correct Baka?" I said in an innocent voice. Then I faked a kick to his… area… and poked his eyes. After that I palmed his nose. Not hard enough to be lethal but hard enough to draw blood and watery vision. I grabbed the girl's hand.

"Come one! Let's play somewhere else!" I bubbled. Just like nothing had happened.

We ended up going into a crowded hall way where he couldn't attack us without being caught. We stayed away from the doors in case of ambush. While she looked crept out I talked about lots of things from unicorns to ears of corn looking around the entire time.

When I finally took a breath she rushed to say something.

"Thank you but I don't know your name." she stuck out her hand seeing I stopped talking to listen, "Aiko and Yours?"

"I'm Kagami!" I said shaking her hand. She gasped

"Not the Kagami Hokkaido, The female student who received the highest average in the building?"

"I think so."

"Wow! Thank you so much! It's a pleasure to meet you!"

"It's a pleasure to meet you too, Aiko-chan. Why did that big bully pick on you? You seem nice."

"He's made me do his homework since the grade school. I hate him!"

"Good, he's as dumb as he looks. I think I'll scare him a bit with some ghosts on string." I giggled. She gave a beaming smile and laughed.

"Thank you! It was nice meeting you!" she tried to stick out her hand but it was crushed by a hug from me.

"The pleasure was mine, Aiko! Bye!" I ran off. Now where's Hitoshi…

* * *

"Kagami." A cool voice called. Not now, I was looking for Hitoshi to play our game. I really wanted to bite him…

"Yes?" I said twirling around to face the cutie. It was Kyoya.

"Come here for a second" he said walking off into a room. Me being me, I followed him.

He finally stopped walking when we were in an empty class room. Apparently his class was at lunch. Why was he still here then? He should be eating. I saw a glowing laptop next to some yearbooks and notebooks. I realized that they were schools near the prestigious orphanage. I wonder why he thought we'd hang out in that dump.

"I've looked through all the yearbooks of the public middle schools and high schools near the orphanage were you all were adopted and it seems you don't exist-"

"Then I'm not here now am I?" I sang.

"You didn't let me finish; now I was going to say that maybe you didn't get your picture taken in the yearbooks but what girl wouldn't want that?"

"Me. I have bad red eye."

"Then why aren't you in the schools system?" Ha he looks so smug right now. Too bad he's the one that's caught.

"I didn't school there." He glared like I'd cut him off again.

"As I see now, so I asked the orphanage that I thought you went too and they said they didn't know _who you were_. So who are you? And where are you really from?" I couldn't help it. I laughed long and loud at his remark. He's such a creeper. But he'll probably do this his whole life for organizations. They pay good money for stuff like this interrogation. I think I'll play with him for a while!

"Silly Kyoya, your experiment went wrong! Your hypothesis for why this happened?"

"What… are you talking about?" mind games are fun.

"Think of this like a science experiment. What were some things that could have misled you? Sources, time frame, people involved, technology failures, wrong school, wrong town, what was it? Everything fits perfectly but its two different puzzle games. Put it together." I turned to leave but he called after me

"Who are you?" he asked again, curiosity and determination in his eyes.

"You're friendly neighborhood spider man? Close, but not quite, maybe it was your fairy godmother? Or was it the Albert Einstein… no wait! I know! It's Kagami Hokkaido." I struck a superman pose and looked at him for a reaction. I got one when he laughed. I smiled, "if you really want to know, find the experimental error."

"Was it the wrong orphanage?" yes, he's not as dumb as he looks!

"Yes" I replied in German. Then I left.

Oh shoot…he takes German and I forgot to tell him to eat lunch. I popped back in.

"Go eat lunch string bean!" I yelled at him. He looked surprised but cleaned up his stuff.

* * *

We were heading to the cafeteria when he spoke next.

"When do you plan on visiting the host club?"

"Never, it smells like cheese."

"Where did you get that idea?"

"From Tamaki when he was yelling at Haruhi about boys. He said she shouldn't go near them because they smell funny."

"And you don't like cheese?"

"I only don't like the smelly kind." I had a feeling we weren't talking about cheese any more. "You know, you shouldn't skip lunch sometimes"

"That reminds me, why did you call me a string bean?"

"That's what Rika-chan calls you behind your back. She also says not to go to the host club because they are potential rapists."

"And what lead her to that conclusion?"

"She's says that you guys are just male hookers in training. She also thinks you're going to work in Hooters when you grow up."

"Well you can tell her were not male hookers because all we do is flirt."

"She also thinks you're a creeper but I think you're not."

"Oh really now, and what do you think about me" we stopped walking and looked at each other.

"I think… YOU'RE JUST DETERMINED!"

"… To do what exactly?"

"Impress someone. I mean, you obviously have a goal socially which could indicate that your trying to impress someone and I think the best way to do that is to make friends."

"Make friends?"

"Yeah. Get out there and make so many friends that you'll never have to worry about money, food, shelter, or happiness because that's what friends are for."

"And what about love? Can friends help with that?"

"Sometimes…sometimes a friendship can bloom into something great. Whether it becomes a love or a family like tie, it's up to you. Sometimes a friend can help you find your love. A friend can also help you get through the end of one, but you'll never know because you don't let your friends help. You don't try to make new friends either."

"But how do you know, how do you know when have a friend that can help you? Help you find a love or become a love?" I just realized how close we were to each other. So close that I could smell his breath on my lips and hear his barely audible whisper.

"When you can't stop"

"Stop what?"

"Stop it from happening, that rolling felling like you forgot something yet your found something better. That's the feeling." He was so close. I could see tiny mustache hairs on his lip. Wait…why was I looking at his lips? Uh oh, I just realized what is going on here. He's asking me for advice! He likes some one! Damn… he was cute…I pulled away.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I said. I wasn't looking at him, "I hope the person you like knows you're a great guy." I started walking away.

"Kagami! You know you shouldn't skip out on lunch." He called. I smirked at the thought of my words against me. I turned to look at him, he was holding out his hand. Laughing I took it.

"Time for lunch."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Kagami had her chapter, its back to my perspective. Thank god. The weirdest part was that Kyoya looked different at me now (if I ever saw him in the hallway or something). It's like he knows that I think the host club is full of potential rapists/male hookers. God I hate this, not the Kyoya part (well it kind of is), but Kaoru kissing me on the cheek the other day. He's not European he's Japanese!

What if he's gay? Not to offend anyone, I think homosexuals are awesome, except for the Hitachiin brothers. That's really creepy. Does that mean that their brotherly love is real? Is _that_ why Hikaru is avoiding Maiko? Man I feel like Tamaki guessing all of this.

I kind of have an excuse for thinking like Tamaki; Kaoru kissing me was out of line. You know it's not fun when you become friends with someone and then later that day they kiss you.

"Rika are you okay?" Akihiro asked while he had walked by my bedroom (In case you guys forgot Akihiro is my adopted father and Masuyo is my adopted mother).

"Huh…yeah I'm fine, I'm just thinking of something" I replied. Akihiro nodded and continued walking. I blew my hair out of my face and sat up on my bed. Should I just face him and ask why he did that, should I ignore him, or should I forget that anything happened. I'll try to erase Kaoru kissing me from my memory…even though I did enjoy it.

I got up and threw on a jacket and put on sneakers. I then proceeded out of my bedroom.

"Where are you going?" Masuyo asked me as I passed by her.

"Out, I need to clear my head a bit." I replied.

"Alright…don't be out too late it is a school night" she told me. I knew she didn't approve, but I was a big girl.

I walked out the door and down the street; and then towards town. Is there something wrong with me? How could I like a man hooker's affection! Once a man hooker always a man hooker, there's no going back. My real mother and older sister would agree…if they were still with me.

Borbala "Bunko" Instinskyaya "Ishikawa" is my sister. My mother was Afanasiia "Chiyoko" Klutrova Instinskyaya "Ishikawa". My father passed away when I was a baby, his name was Foma Instinsky. My name is Radinka "Rika" Instinskyaya "Ishikawa". I am 100% Russian. The names in quotation marks are our fake names when we came to Japan trying to get away from the Soviet Union, since it was at its highest peak (in a bad way!).

When I was nine we went to Japan. Borbala was fifteen at the time and had ran away from home, nobody has seen or heard from her ever since. Sounds like a murder mystery, eh well it happens. Afanasiia was killed in a car crash. I went to the orphanage where I met my friends, and you know how it is now. The weird part is that my mother's name meant immortal. I sighed, not because I was upset (well I was with myself), but because I realized that if I didn't start going home now I'd be in huge trouble.

I turned around and started walking home at a slight faster pace than before. Amaya was part Greek, part Croatian, and part Yugoslavian. Hitoshi was part Italian, part British, and part Canadian. Avaron was German and Japanese and the twins were Italian, Native American, African, Scottish, German, and Irish. (A/N: Any others I didn't remember about the twins or Amaya?)

I was back in my room thirteen minutes before Masuyo and Akihiro would yell at me. I grabbed pajamas and started to change into them. After changing I went to sleep and waited for the next day to bloom. In the middle of the night I had woken up because I fell off of my bed, which was uncommon. Usually Maiko falls off the bed. I got up off of the floor and back into bed to continue my sleep.

After waking up for school, I decided that I wasn't wearing the uniform anymore. The dress was annoying and I couldn't stand it. Plus after listening to Kagami whine and complain about hers, it'd make you want to not wear it. Amaya walked into my room.

"Amaya, what do you think of our school uniforms?" I asked her.

"There are things I shouldn't say… you planning on not wearing it?" she replied.

"Yep" I told her. She then went to my closet and started picking things out for me. I then looked at what she picked out, a black and cream striped sweater, a velvet mini skirt that ends at the thigh and black tights. I looked at her.

"What you can wear it with sneakers" Amaya responded.

"You're joking right?"

"Of course not it'll look great on you"

"Yes but… skirts aren't my thing…"

"With tights it's better. Besides you never let me dress you up" Amaya said. I sighed then started to change. Amaya told me she needed to get ready for school and went into her bedroom. I brushed my hair and put on a dark headband to top it off. First thought of the day, I feel girly. I can't believe I'm wearing this.

"I can't believe she's wearing that" I heard Kaoru say to Hikaru as I walked by them. Great… I still feel uncomfortable around him. I sat down in my seat and waited for class to begin. Kagami sat down next to me.

"Kagami…this isn't your seat"

"Talk to Kaoru. Kyoya told me he's being weird. Also want to come to the host club with me today?"

"Kagami, you _know _what I think of them. And why would you talk to Kyoya? You're the one who told him my thoughts of the host club! Kagami I am ashamed, how could you tell him about man hookers?" I yelled. Some people started looking at us. The teacher walked into the classroom and Kagami went back to her desk. Kaoru sat down next to me. I was confused, and then I remembered that we were partners for the project. He had the baby with him. I grinned and waited for the teacher to start.

"Good, you have the babies… well most of you", she said eyeing Kagami and Kasanoda; "Today we're learning how to change a diaper. And before any of you groan, whine and complain, I want you to know that this is a big part of your grade, because nobody wants to have poop and pee in their clothing for a while. Got it? Good, now let's begin." Then everyone groaned. Okay…so does this baby actually poop? Oh dear lord, I don't want to feed it now. Kaoru's feeding and changing this thing.

The teacher than droned on about changing a diaper; Kagami had no problem with the assignment except that her baby's leg fell off. Then after that Kasanoda started yelling at her. Many other groups like Kaoru and I had some trouble, but I think Maiko and Hikaru had the most. Maiko was trying to get assignment done and whenever she needed help Hikaru refused to help and then they started fighting. Man…class was weird today.

It was a little strange, because Kaoru acted like nothing happened, about him kissing my cheek I mean, not the chunk of plastic going to the bathroom. Maybe I should too. Yeah I should…but maybe he is European…what am I talking about he's a Japanese citizen, wait he's a citizen right? Why I am I still thinking about this? Man I need a life.

And the greatest part is, is that at that moment my cell phone went off, playing А Может Да (Maybe Yes) by Света (Sveta). Oh crap… I thought I turned my ringer off. The teacher glared at me. Some people were confused with the language. I slowly grabbed my phone out of my pocket and turned the ringer off and put it away.

"Gomenasai" I spoke quietly. Lucky for me the bell rang. I quickly gathered my things and got out of there with Kagami and Maiko following.

"Wait up Radinka!" Kagami yelled. Yes my friends know my real name. Of course I let them catch up, one I'm wearing a skirt, two I hate running, and three their my best friends.

"So you forgot to turn your phone off" spoke Maiko. I nodded as we walked down the hall to our next class.

"That sucks…" Kagami said.

"Yes. Yes it does suck. I wonder who was calling anyway." I told them taking my phone out to check. I saw the caller ID and was confused. It said North Dakota.

"WHAT'S A DAKOTA!" Kagami screeched after seeing the caller ID.

"Shut up Kagami" Maiko and I said in unison.

"North Dakota is a state in the US. It's probably a wrong number anyway" I reassured Kagami who was confused. For someone getting straight A's she should know that.

"OH MY GOD MAIKO THIS IS NOT GOOD! THOSE CRUMMY AMERICANS ARE AFTER RIKA! MORE IMPORTANLY THEY'VE FIGURED OUT THAT I KEEP ON BOMBING THEM!"

"Kagami…you aren't the reason for World War II…" I told the idiot girl.

"Yes but I keep trying to buy parakeets from them…" she responded.

"That's a whole different story…" Maiko replied.

"And why would they be after me…" I questioned.

"Because I'm friends with you, I shouldn't have emailed everything about us to their president." Kagami said.

"YOU WHAT!" Maiko and I shouted.

"I was bored! Besides Maiko you told me to get a pen pal!"

"Yeah some lonely person outside this country, not the leader of America!"

"Hey look its lunch time!" Kagami spoke changing the conversation so Maiko can stop yelling at her. Why does Kagami always use lunch time as a distraction? I sighed then proceeded to the cafeteria. Man today was really weird. I'm never letting Amaya dress me up again.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

I think it is all fair if I were to explain to you my relationship with Kagami and Maiko. Those two are my…SUPER best friends…I guess. Anyway I've known them for a while and have been there…but everybody messes up…and Kagami messes up…a lot. She knows not to invite man rapists over but one little rule won't stop her.

* * *

It was a peaceful weekend morning, today I didn't have to see any man rapists or man hookers today and I could sleep in, read a good book, watch some stupid horror movies and make fun of them with Kagami, Maiko, and Hitoshi, and eat my Russian imported red caviar. Yum! Living with two rich "parents" gives you some pointers sometimes (caviar~). I was half asleep and I wanted to sleep in this morning. But that was ruined because I heard many footsteps, annoying voices, and Kagami. You should be afraid…very afraid now. After a good five-ten minutes I got up and went downstairs in my pajamas.

All I saw was Kagami making breakfast, and a bunch of man hookers (except Haruhi…she was cool…and not a man…and probably in the bathroom) sitting in our kitchen and living room.

"Good morning Rika!" Kagami spoke with a giggly attitude.

"Why are _they_ here?" I asked her.

"I invited them for breakfast!"

"I'm going back to bed." I told her treading back up the stairs.

"NO! Rika! Stay down here! Please?" she begged. I scowled.

"Fine, as long as we can watch our horror movies later." I responded.

Kagami stared at me, "Who said I'd give up on a horror movie offer?"

"Nobody…but I don't want them here when we watch one…"

"Then we watch one later!" Kagami demanded. DAMN IT!

"Your house is so beautiful, so romantic, clean, and fresh!" Tamaki demanded. I threw a spoon at his head.

"Don't be a douche." Before I knew it I felt a pair of arms wrap around me. Kaoru Hitachiin. I started flailing my arms around and trying to squirm out of his grip. It didn't work. Bastard.

"Kaoru, I think you should get off… Rika looks kind of pissed…" Kagami mumbled. Finally her brain works! Maiko walked into the kitchen.

"Kagami…why is the host club here?" Kagami's older sister asked.

"I invited them! I'm making pancakes, want some?" she spoke getting off topic. Maiko nodded and flopped onto the couch.

"Maiko, are you joining us for horror movies later?" I questioned. She nodded. I clapped and finally pushed Kaoru off of me. He fell onto the floor.

"Why did you do that?" he asked.

"You were annoying…"

"I'm offended!"

"You should be." I spoke. Kaoru stood up with a scowl and went back to sitting next to Hikaru. I am so hitting Kagami with a shovel today.

* * *

Soon the rest piled into the kitchen living room area. Akihiro and Masuyo…hmm…let's say they could be pissed.

Akihiro's thoughts of the day: HOLY CRAP! I DON'T WANT SO MANY DAUGHTERS! CAN WE TAKE THEM BACK! PLEEEAAAASEEE? PLEEEAAAAASSEEEE!- But wait! I can finally use that expensive sword that is hanging over the fire place! YEEEEEEEESSSSS!  
Masuyo's thoughts of the day: OMG THEY ARE SO HOT! Damn they are too young…Maybe Akihiro won't mind…STOP THINKING LIKE A SHOJO MANGA READER MASUYO!

Or something along those lines… Kagami made semi okay pancakes, considering she rarely cooked. Amaya was lounging on the couch with Honey waiting for Avaron to come over, since she had invited her the night before. Kagami was annoying Kyoya in the kitchen, Maiko was scolding Hikaru for not participating in the project enough on the living room carpet, Haruhi came out of the bathroom and was talking to our "parents" about the structure of the house and what not, and I was sitting at the counter with Kaoru and Tamaki. Kaoru was trying to make conversation but I ignored him because Tamaki did something…interesting.

"Hey guys! Look at these!" Tamaki yelled pumping his arm in the air revealing many…shag…sex…something like that bracelets.

"Wow boss! They're so colorful!" the Hitachiin twins said in unison. Anybody that has been to America (Amaya, Maiko, Kagami, Hitoshi, and I) started freaking out and screaming things like "THEY CAME TO JAPAN", and "WE'RE DOOMED", and don't forget "BATTLE STATIONS!". But then we just started laughing our asses off. Anybody who hasn't been to America, (everybody else in the room) looked at us confused.

"I don't get it…" Tamaki spoke. We kept on laughing. Then Hitoshi decided to speak up.

"Nothing *laugh* sexual *laugh* happens if *laugh* one breaks!". The host club, Akihiro, and Masuyo looked at him confused. "I'll show you."

"DON'T DO IT HITOSHI!" Kagami screamed as we all ducked down behind the couch. He grabbed an orange **(A/N: It means hug right…?)** bracelet and snapped it in front of Tamaki and hugged him.

"See nothing sexual at all…" We wiped away the sweat drops.

"Oh okay! Kyoya let's break the black **(A/N: and this one is full on bonk (don't feel like saying the actual word…too dirty…)?)** one then!" Tamaki decided.

"NO! DON'T DO IT TAMAKI! YOU STUPID MINDED FOOL!" we all yelled and Kagami decided it was time to tackle him. This was the point Avaron walked in.

"Why is Kagami wrestling a cute guy?" she asked.

"Ava-chan!" we yelled.

"No seriously. Why is wrestling a cute guy…wait a minute that sounds dirty!" Avaron declared.

"The idiot bought those sex bracelets…" Amaya said. Avaron gasped in horror and ducked behind the couch.

"What's so wrong about the bracelets guys? I think they're cute~" Honey spoke.

"Each bracelet stands for something different you will do with a guy or girl…like sexual things…orange is hug, black is full on sex…things like that. When one breaks you have to do whatever it stands for with a guy or girl." I explained slowly. They all cringed in horror.

"Exactly…" Maiko stated and took all of the bracelets off of Tamaki's arms, cut them and threw them away. "Now nobody can wear them."

* * *

Kyoya Ootori was frustrated. He still hadn't figured out where any of these people had come from. He relaxed in the limousine he had been riding in, and unfortunately they had to drive through the bad part of the city. What had caught Kyoya's eyes **(A/N: all four of them…I know that's mean…I wear glasses too!) **was a woman, who looked nothing Japanese (more Slavic), with light brown hair and crystal blue eyes…just like Rika's.

"Please pull over." He told his driver. The driver requested his wish and Kyoya stepped out of the car and stared at the woman.

"Оставьте меня!"(Leave me alone!(Russian)) the girl screamed at Kyoya, in a language he didn't understand, as she pulled out a gun. He put his hands up showing her that he didn't mean harm. She slowly lowered the gun a bit.

"What is your name?" Kyoya asked her.

"I do not wish to say…" she said quietly.

"Please answer my question."

"Go away…before I will shoot you…" the woman spoke. Kyoya hesitated. She raised the gun and shot at a street lantern and cracked the light bulb. Kyoya got back into the limousine and started driving off, not getting the weird woman out of his mind.

* * *

Finally this story is getting a plot! No Kyoya is not crushing on the lady that almost killed him... think back to chapter 3


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

"Radinka, let me borrow a pencil." Kagami said jabbing my side with her thumb in the middle of our history class.

"Kagami, I don't have a pencil! I'm writing in pen anyway." I responded.

"Fine…will you go to the host club with me now?"

"What? No!"

"Please? I don't want to go home right away, Akihiro will be gloating about his awesome sword skills, which he really doesn't have and all he does is just flail the thing around and he almost stabbed Hitoshi. That's my job!" she told me. I sighed a deeply.

"Fine."

"Wait…what? You're agreeing with me?" Kagami questioned. I nodded. She had a confused look on her face.

"It doesn't make sense to argue with you anymore, you'll keep on bugging me 'til I give. I know your techniques Kagami…just doesn't mean I know how to avoid them yet…" She giggled.

"You're the best Radinka!" was all I heard before she tackled me, which in her opinion was a hug at the very moment.

* * *

Why were we here again? Oh yeah Kagami. I sat in a semi comfy chair with my legs crossed leaning back while Kagami was fiddling around with her hands trying to understand a "magic trick" that Maiko showed her. Maybe we can just sit here and that could be nice. Of course not this is Kagami we are talking about, and when she isn't trying to cuddle or kill Hitoshi she's doing _something_. Kyoya, aka RAPIST #1, walked by and Kagami noticed.

"Kyoya!" Kagami shouted as she gripped onto his arm quickly. His facial expression read that he knew he was screwed. Ha, ha welcome to my world. Kyoya groaned.

"Yes Kagami?" he asked.

"Look I got Ra-Rika to come! See? RIKA SAY HI!" Kagami told him almost screwing up my name.

I sighed deeply, "Hi Rapist Numero Uno!" His face turned blank. Kagami gave me a look and then turned her attention back to Kyoya.

"Kyoya I have a question for you!" Kyoya sighed and looked at the…DEMON girl.

"What could it possibly be Kagami?" Kyoya questioned.

"You're always so sour! That's why Rika and I are going to take you for ice cream!" Kagami sang. Wait…WHAT!

"Hell. NO. Kagami!" I shouted. Kagami gave me a determined stare.

"Can I come for ice cream?" Kaoru, aka Rapist Number Five, asked.

"No!" I shouted once more.

"Yes!" Kagami shouts back. Remind me to kill her later. Kaoru smiles, for some reason that smile makes my stomach feel weird. I don't like it. Also, remind me to buy _Pepto-Bismol_™ later.

"Where will we go for ice cream?" Kyoya asks.

"I know this place! It's really good and cheap too!" Kagami responded.

"Isn't that where you work?" I questioned. She nodded. "And didn't you get 'fired'?"

"Yes, but it's called a break. Due to my muscle spasms, which my boss knows of, I ended up punching a really good customer in the face. He has a black eye now. I mean it's not like I'm permanently banned or anything."

* * *

We reached the small little ice cream parlor. I thought this place was really nice; it had homemade ice cream and everything! Kagami walked forward to the door and made sure we were right behind her. Then out of random she kicked the door open screaming "HIYA BOSS! I'M READY FOR WORK!"

Her boss turned around surprised. He was an average sized Japanese man, with jet black hair and hazel eyes, a small beer belly, and was around fifty years of age.

"Kagami! You are on 'break'! Go home!" he yelled.

"Aww! But boss, I'm just joking! We want ice cream!"

"Well I guess you can stay…I mean you are our best customer…you end up spending your paycheck on more ice cream…-wait _we_?"

"Yes! We've got our albino friend from Siberia, Rika! You met her before! And two new people that you haven't met!"

"Kagami, you and I both know I'm not from Siberia." I stated.

"Psh, warm-ish Russia and cold Russia. Same thing!" she said. I rolled my eyes at my friend's annoyingness.

"Hello there Rika. Pleasure to see you again. Now who are these new people you've mentioned?" her boss asked.

"THESE PEOPLE!" Kagami yelled dragging in Kyoya and Kaoru. Her boss grinned hello.

"Uh…hi?" was their basic response.

After a few minutes of picking which flavors, pushing Kaoru away from me, making sure Kagami didn't try to dive behind the counter and eat ice cream that wasn't for sale yet, something very strange happened.

"I'll pay." Kyoya spoke taking out his wallet. What…the…hell? All of us literally started screaming and we started running for our lives out of the store to the car.

* * *

"GUYS HE'S AFTER US!" Kaoru yelled as he turned his head to see where Kyoya was.

"RUN FASTER! WE MUST GET AWAY BEFORE HE DIVIDES BY ZERO!"**(A/N: Who recognized that?)** Kagami replied still yelling and running. We all started running faster to the limousine. After a bunch of running and screaming we made it to the vehicle. I tried to open the door. No luck. Where did the driver go?

"What happened to the driver?" Kaoru asked worried. I shrugged.

"There's only two ways to get in…" Kagami spoke. I looked at her.

"You mean?" I asked. She nodded. Kaoru was confused. The two of us nodded at each other and pushed Kaoru out of the way. We stepped back.

"1…2…3…CHARGE!" we screamed in unison as we ran forward into the limousine and body slammed the freaking thing. Nothing.

"AGAIN!" I shouted. We kept on doing the same thing a few times.

"It's not going to budge you two! Now what's the other way?" Kaoru spoke.

"I'd have to hi-jack the limousine…" Kagami said sweetly. I looked over my shoulder and saw that Kyoya was almost here; just by walking…wow we must be really bad at running. **(A/N: The real Kagami and I actually are…). **

"Do it! He's almost here!" I shouted. Kagami nodded. Unfortunately before any decent progress was made Kyoya made it to his destination.

"Hello." The evil man spoke. We all had our backs pressed to the limousine's side and started screaming.

* * *

Sorry to cut in on this beautiful horror movie scene, but Rika's had enough talking. Now I will make more of an appearance. It is I, AMAYA! Too dramatic? I thought so too…anyways I had a tea party with Honey. Yes I was forced into it. But, I must admit, it was a lot of fun. Especially with the two of our bun-buns. They are so soft and cuddly…and adorable…almost like King Kazma from Summer Wars…but King Kazma was hot…I'm babbling…would you look at that! Well I'm just a little filler for now, as Rika calls it…but I apparently will have my spotlight sometime soon. Well I guess there's that to look forward to…not really…well I'm going to go do something interesting with Avaron and make sure we don't get hit with Akihiro's sword. Bye for now!

* * *

You know what, I'll do author notes in this Ouran fanfic now, I was too lazy before...hehe...anyway this running thing actually happened to the real Kagami and I...it was after my school play and the real Kagami made nice with a little girl, who is actually one of my friend's(who was one of the leads) little sister. This little girl is actually a demon child...*shudder* and we were outside. I don't remember why but for some reason I started running, probably to see what would happen. Kagami thought that the girl was chasing us so she started running away from her screaming. I heard her and we both started running away from the little girl because we thought she was going to get us. When we got to my mom's car it was locked and we started body slamming into the car trying to open it. Meanwhile the real Maiko stole a bunch of balloons from my school and was walking around with them and was screaming when we told her to let them go...


	7. Chapter 7

I'm sorry if this chapter makes no sense what so ever... it was written by the real Kagami...again...but at one point I took the computer from her because her grammar sucks...soo...considering I'm a grammar nazi (and Jewish)...well...you'll see what happens...

* * *

Chapter Seven

"I FOUND THE PUPPETS!" Oh shit. How did she find them! I thought I had hidden them from here. Too…many…bad…memories!

"Kagami, where the hell did you find those?"

"In the closet next to Chucky!" did she seriously just refer to _Child's Play_? Wow… just…wow. I tried to look behind her back at the puppets but she skipped away. HOW DO YOU SKIP BACKWARDS! I just hope she doesn't perform for the gang later.

* * *

I stalked into the host club, searching for Kagami. I hope the man hookers didn't kidnap her. Or worse, if she kidnapped them!

"WHO WANTS TO SEE A PUPPET SHOW!" oh shit! I better hurry up before she starts anything!

I ran as fast as I could. I hope she didn't perform anything too drastic. I kicked open the door Akihiro style. God… I've been living with them too long.

"I LOVE YOU HIKARU! I LOVE YOU TOO MAIKO! NOM, NOM, NOM! WE'RE JUST TOO STUBBORN TO ADMIT IT! Is their love doomed! Not while Tamaki and Kagami are around, TO THE RESCUE!" Shit… Maiko's going to be pissed! Looking around I saw they were performing it… in front of customers. And everyone else had sweat drops. Except Hikaru, He looked just as pissed as Maiko **(A/N: We just realized in real life the Host Club would actually hate us…go figure…yes we do act like this^^)**. One of the extremely annoying Tamaki fans, walked over to Kagami and Tamaki's makeshift playhouse made out of a table cloth and two chairs.

"I'm glad you're taking time out of your busy schedule to play with this commoner here, but you're forgetting *random creepy cough* that you still have customers to attend to."

Kagami looked shocked. "Lady who are you calling a commoner! I am anything but common! I am abnormal! There is only one of me! Then again…I have a twin…THIS IS CONFUSING!" Tamaki put out one of his "charming" smiles.

"I apologize for the wait, but she does bring out the little kid in me. I like showing little children the right path to the future. I just love taking care of children." –insert fan girl screams/squeals-…

"Pedophile," I said without realizing it. –insert fan girl GLARES- …ouch…

"If she brings out the kid in you I worry about how you acted as a child. She doesn't seem like the sharpest knife in the drawer." The weird chick continued…what a bitch!

"Hey I resent that! I get A's in all my classes! You probably get B's and F's for FABALALALABABAS!"

"That's not a word." Kyoya stated.

"Yes it is! The spell check didn't say anything as the word came down! I don't know what the hell you're talking about creeper!"

"I am not creepy."

"Fine, you're a loner! Do you need a hug?"

"No."

"RIKA GO GIVE KYOYA A HUG!" Kagami shouted while pointing at Kyoya.

I shouted, "Hell no!" After a short silent period I see Kagami whispering something in Tamaki's ear. They both nod and go back under the table cloth.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN PRESENTING…RIKA AND KAORU'S LOVE AFFAIR!"

I was pissed and puzzled at the same time, "Love affair!"

"When did it become an affair!" Kaoru demanded.

"Uh, when you and Rika where mad at Hikaru and Maiko for not knowing if they could be stuck with their twin forever so the two of them decided to try out each other, and then Kaoru and Rika got together to get back at the other two," Tamaki spoke. **(A/N: Which never happened . Kagami...)** All I caught from that super long babble was twin, Maiko, two, and I think I might have heard the word chicken.

"LA LA LA! HEY RIKA! LET'S GET BACK AT HIKARU AND MAIKO BY GOING OUT WITH EACH OTHER!" Kagami yelled playing Kaoru.

"I'm not so sure I'd rather be depressed and in the corner being angry at everyone!" Tamaki acted as me.

"I do not sound like that! And I am not depressed and I am not angry at everyone. It's mostly you!" I shouted at Tamaki.

"Why do you pick on the handsome and charming one?" he questioned.

"Handsome and charming my ass! You are strongly mistaken."

"ON WITH THE SHOW!" Kagami screeched.

"NOM, NOM, NOM I LOVE YOU KAORU!"

"NOM, NOM, NOM I LOVE YOU RIKA!"

"LETS GET MARRIED!" the two shouted in somewhat perfect unison… and then the random bitch from before walks over and slaps Kagami in the face.

"This is ridiculous! It's totally degrading for a person of Tamaki's status! He shouldn't be playing puppet show he should be taking care of his customers." Kagami made a very sad looking face and then broke out into a very evil looking grin. Worse than Kyoya's…

"I suggest you don't take your limousine home today. Something already happened to it."

"OH MY GOD! HER WORK WAS EVEN FASTER THAN KYOYA'S! AND HER GRIN! IT'S SO EVIL!" the twins shouted in unison.

"That came as no surprise what so ever to me." Hitoshi stated. The bitchy lady had left the room at this point. After a few minutes we hear a very high pitch scream from outdoors.

"I told her not to take the limousine" Kagami spoke in an innocent/evil baby voice, and then she giggled. I think they forgot about the puppet show for now…thank goodness. Out of nowhere Kagami pulled out a paintball gun, which she most likely hid in her dress. "HITOSHI LET'S PLAY TAG!"

"NO!" I yelled while running and tackled her. Haruhi looked confused.

"Where the hell did she get the paintball gun?" Haruhi mumbled.

"No weapons on school ground Kagami." Kyoya spoke.

"It's not a weapon! It's how we play tag!" Kagami responded. Hitoshi had fear in his eyes.

"Oh! I got a present!" Kaoru remembered. For some reason this day keeps getting weirder and weirder. Kaoru ran over to me holding a green gift bag, and holding it out to me. I was confused.

-Fan girl screams/squeals AGAIN! (Tamaki is the loudest squealer)-

"What did you get her! WHAT DID YOU GET HER!" Tamaki screamed. Realization hit me. He was giving me a present. I have a feeling somebody slipped something in my food this morning. I suspiciously looked at Kagami. Kaoru holds it out to me again. I sighed and opened it.

I slowly pulled out whatever the hell it was.

"It's a narwhale!" Kagami screamed. Maiko hit her upside the head.

"It's a unicorn dumbass," Maiko told her. I stared at the unicorn stuffed toy. It was a lavender color with a pink mane. It was really thoughtful and I liked it…but it's really confusing as to why he gave it to me. Then I remembered that morning when Kagami invited them over.

* * *

_"Okay, if you could be anything you wanted to be what would you be?" Kagami asked._

_"Happy." Maiko said. Almost everyone 'awww'ed at that. Kagami slapped her sister._

_"You got that from a movie!" Maiko rubbed her head, "Now moving on, Amaya what do you want to be?"_

_"Um…an artist…?" Amaya spoke._

_"Not what you are! What you want to be! Grr…moving on! Hitoshi-wait, never mind I don't want to hear your answer. Rika!" Kagami continued._

_"A UNICORN!" I shouted._

_"Why the hell would you want to be a unicorn?" Hikaru asked me._

_"A NON-BELIEVER!" I screamed. He face palmed. _

_"…ANYWAY! Tamaki!" Kagami said. _

_"I want to be handsome!" he spoke up._

_"Not what you are or what you think you are! What you want to be! Damn it, nobody is getting this right." Kagami continued, "Now...Avaron!"_

_"I want to be a dinosaur! And the only way to become that is by getting a STD!"_

_"…"_

_"Avaron…for the MILLIONTH time, a STD will not turn you into a dinosaur! It will just give you a trip to the clinic!" I stated._

_"…oh yeah…what does STD stand for again?" Avaron questioned. _

_"You innocent child…you don't even know what you are saying…" Maiko spoke. Avaron shrugged._

_"Okay…now it's Honey's turn!" Kagami sang._

_"I want to be cake!"_

_"Yes! You got it right!"_

_"Wait a minute! I said unicorn! How did I get it wrong?" I shouted._

_"Cause I said so!" Kagami fought back. I scowled. And it kept on going with Kagami yelling at Kyoya for saying he wants to continue the family business and told him to want to be something like a tree, and Haruhi ending up with florist, Mori just grinning and saying a fork. _**(A/N: Cause fork and cake go together…hehe)**

_And then we played the "Which Animal Would You Be?" game. It was exactly like the game before just which animal you wanted to be. I already knew my answer, so I was really excited when it was my turn._

_"Okay, Rika what animal do you want to be?" I was asked by Avaron._

_"A unicorn."_

_"Other than a unicorn."_

_"A narwhale. The unicorns of the sea."_

_"Why do you want to be a unicorn so badly!" Hitoshi shouted._

_"Because unicorns are amazing creatures that happen to be deadly weapons." I stated. I then heard him mumbling something that sounded like "Damn Russian, trying to make a weapon out of anything…"_

* * *

"Um…thank…you…?" I spoke.

"Can I have a kiss?" Kaoru asked.

"Yeah sure," I replied.

His face lit up, "Really?"

I nodded, "Yeah close your eyes." He did as I said. I grabbed the toy unicorn and smacked him across the face with it.

"Ow! What did you do that for?" he asked rubbing his face. I just proved Hitoshi wrong. Unicorns _are_ deadly weapons.

"I don't kiss before the first date. What do you take me for, a slut?" I questioned.

"Will you go out with me then?" Kaoru asked.

"No."

* * *

Hehe aren't unicorns and narwhales amazing? The real Maiko came up with the unicorn b*tchslap part. Teehee! ^^

I told you this chapter wouldn't make sense...But then again neither do any other chapters, considering I don't have a plot, I just improvise as I write.


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